Everything in your life is 100% up to you.
It is not the event or the circumstance in your life that determines how your life is, but rather your response to the event or circumstance, that determines how the world responds to you.
You are not the victim of your life’s events – you are the creator!
The world is responding to you.
How you think, feel and physically present yourself holds much power over the circumstances of your world.
In his book “The Success Principles” Jack Canfield, author of the Chicken Soup for The Soul series, offers this formula for success in life: E + R = O
The Events in your life plus your Response equals the Outcome.
If E = 2 and R = 5, then the Outcome = 7. (Or, 2+5=7) If you don’t like the result of 7, then the easiest way to change the Outcome is to change R (Your Response).
The power is in the Response. You have the power to change anything and everything in your life, simply by changing your response. Just by changing your response, you can alter the world’s Outcome accordingly.
Your “State” and your “Story”.
State and story – story and state. It becomes a “Which comes first, the chicken or the egg?” scenario, where one influences the other, and vice versa.
State of Being…
Let’s start with your “State”. Being human, you have the ability to “Be” (or become) any state you set your focus on.
You can become angry, sad, clear, confused, lost, found, present, absent, happy, joyous, etc… You can feel across the entire spectrum of human emotions, focusing toward any imaginable and desirable state.
My Fifth Grade English teacher at St. Benedicts Middle School wrote the following word on the chalkboard:
She wrote it out this way so we would remember it. This one word is all of the tenses of the verb “To Be”:
To Be, I Am, She Is, They Are, He Was, They Were, She Is Being, He has Been.
It’s powerful and simple: we are human beings. We can determine our state of being by simply deciding “To Be”.
“To be, or not to be: that is the question….” – William Shakespeare
Your possible responses to the world are infinite. If you restrict yourself to only reusing the same response that has shaped your life thus far, you will live a life of “Repeat…Repeat…Repeat…” rather than “Create…Respond…Create.”
The problem with states is that they are very sticky. Once they have a hold of you it can be quite challenging to remove them, and the more you try – the more they stick.
The trick is not to fight them and to focus on the states you would rather have in the forefront of your life.
The trick is to choose a state that would support your chosen story.
The trick is to tell a better feeling story, which I will get to in a minute – but first let me give you a secret to loosening the “State’s” grip over you.
Whenever you find yourself in states of being that don’t feel good and are not working for you or anyone around you, try this: put your right index finger to the right corner of your mouth and say:
By doing so you will be tapping into your “Personal HorsePower”.
By saying or thinking,“Hmmmm…Interesting!” you automatically put yourself into a state of non-judgmental curiosity. Curiosity is the perfect “State” from which to temporarily remove yourself from the stickiness of the unsavory state that bound you. From here, you can take a step back and re-access the situation without allowing “the heat of the moment” to affect what you are reflexively about to do or say.
It is your judgement of yourself along with your connection to your “old story” that is keeping you stuck. Non-judgemental curiosity allows you to pause, breathe and move forward.
Horses (and you in your “Personal Horsepower” state) don’t judge things as good or bad, as most things in life are never a moral issue. For horses, everything is simply information to react to. Horses can’t buy into the drama of your life’s story. They have zero interest in judging you from a moral standpoint. But horses do easily place themselves into a state of non-judgemental curiosity. And through their curiosity, they are always free “To Be”.
Try this exercise: Think of a reoccurring situation where you typically feel “trapped” or “stuck”. Tap into your Personal Horsepower by saying, “Hmmmm…Interesting!” and notice the immediate freedom you’ve gained by simply breaking your typical response pattern. This offers you a different Power of Perspective, providing yourself the opportunity to create a better feeling story – a story free of judgement.
Horses have survived millions of years by being able to read the states of intention given off in the energy and body language of their predators. In order to do this successfully, they need to be free to respond appropriately to every situation as it presents itself to them. To horses, freedom and a non-judgemental awareness is a life or death issue.
This is their gift to us.
What state are you in now?
What state do you want to be in?
What’s your story?
What story do you want to be your story?
Our State of Being and Our Self-Talk make up our State and Story.
How do you want your Story “To Be”?
It is this story that feels better and better. It is this story that will bring out the best in you and will engage all of your personal horsepower.
It is the state of this story, of your natural becoming, where you are in line with your highest and greatest gifts. It is here that horses can truly connect with you. And it is in these states and stories that you connect fully with yourself.
What State and Story do you choose?
What State of Being and Self-Talk will you use to create the “You” the world will respond to?
Feel The Connection,