Love Archives - Horses Know The Way Home

Forget Forgiveness, Kindness Kicks Ass.

Posted on July 31, 2014 by Brian Reid Posted in Brian's Blog 3 Comments

Kindness Matters

Forget forgiveness as the primary means to moving beyond a troubling situation.

Before I begin, I want to make clear that I think that forgiveness is a powerful tool to help us let go of real and perceived past grievances of others toward us, us toward others and us toward ourselves.

Also let me be clear that I use the power of forgiveness daily to clear space in my life and heart.

Forgiveness does have some drawbacks that I experience when using it as the ONLY way of moving beyond what is and toward what matters.

While I’m in the process of forgiving, I tend to get hung up on three sticky points:

1. While I’m forgiving, I can easily lean toward self righteousness, as I perceive myself as the victim and the other as the oppressor.

2. While forgiving, my focus is on what happened, not what I want to happen.

3. While forgiving, I first realize that I have been blaming for too long which feels like shit and that is not the space I want to forgive from.

Forgiveness by itself is tough to get and keep going.

There is another big brother or sister to forgiveness that can really help get things moving in a better feeling direction.

“Kick Ass Kindness” has taken me and my forgiveness to another space of freedom and empowerment.

The reason I say Kick Ass Kindness, especially when forgiving myself, is because I usually have resistance to what is best for me initially. It takes a loving kind act to take myself by the hand or by the hair kicking and screaming toward what matters most.

Sort of like sending me out to my first summer camp, baseball tryouts or even bodysurfing in the waves. At first I offered resistance and a wall of self consciousness. It always took the encouraging loving words of someone who cares, followed by a kick in the ass that was just enough of the push I needed to get me going.

“Only Kindness Matters”

Pause for a moment and read the lyrics from the Song “Hands” by Jewel

—————————-

“Hands”

If I could tell the world just one thing

It would be that we’re all OK

And not to worry ’cause worry is wasteful

And useless in times like these

I won’t be made useless

I won’t be idle with despair

I will gather myself around my faith

For light does the darkness most fear

My hands are small, I know

But they’re not yours, they are my own

And I am never broken

Poverty stole your golden shoes

It didn’t steal your laughter

And heartache came to visit me

But I knew it wasn’t ever after

We’ll fight, not out of spite

For someone must stand up for what’s right

‘Cause where there’s a man who has no voice

There ours shall go singing

My hands are small I know

But they’re not yours, they are my own

I am never broken

In the end only kindness matters

I will get down on my knees, and I will pray

My hands are small I know

But they’re not yours, they are my own

And I am never broken

My hands are small I know

But they’re not yours, they are my own

And I am never broken

We are never broken

We are God’s eyes

God’s hands

God’s mind

We are God’s eyes

God’s hands

God’s heart

We are God’s eyes

God’s hands

God’s eyes

We are God’s hands

——————————————————

So it is with our hearts, minds, eyes and hands that we can offer ourselves the kindness that the act of kindness offers to the giver and the receiver.

And in the act of kindness, forgiveness is For Giving.

Today I was listening to the 2014 Hay House World Summit’s interview with Michael J Chase.

I heard Michael say that Kindness is Love and Action.

Where there is love, forgiveness has taken place and where there is love and kindness there is someone creating a new experience.

This is where I want to go.

Yes, I want to be forgiving.

More, I want what I want to forgive to be better than before forgiveness was needed.

On Michael’s site you see “Kindness Matters” on the shirts.

At Release Your Inner HorsePower I’m always focused on moving others toward what matters, as they cling to old patterns that no longer serve.

This is where Kick Ass Kindness many times is the most loving, forgiving act I can do for myself or another.

Kindness is Love in Action and I want to move toward what matters!

Do you?

Feel the Connection

Take your turn

Make your move

Create that change

Love,

Brian

Gallop to Freedom

Posted on May 7, 2014 by Brian Reid Posted in Brian's Blog 2 Comments

Gallop to freedom.

Come, gallop with me.
Gallop with me and feel the “Horsepower” of your dreams as they lift you up.
Up over the crushing defeat of complacency.
Up over the withered wishes.
Up over the feelings of “less than”.
Together we gallop and soar!

Soar! Toward a loves’ desire to be free.
Soar! Toward a song that yearns to be heard.
Soar! Toward a human heart that wants to be seen by the eyes that it connects with.
Soar! Toward the ears that ache to hear the words,”I see you” from your lips.

This is where we are travelling together.
Come, fly with me.
Come gallop to freedom.

Gallop to Freedom

There is a yearning behind the eyes of one who loves you. There is a being that longs to whisper into your ear, “You are enough.” There is someone who will not listen to the “stories” of your life’s drama, who refuses to be fooled by the masks you constantly hide behind: Anger and Self-Doubt. You may think that your true self is discreetly tucked away, that you have successfully held away the world for another day, that you remain unseen. But you are mistaken.

There is one day in particular that stands out to me as the day I finally broke through my own glass ceiling. On this beautiful day of flight, I felt a distinct yearning and connection with an 1800lb Shire mare, known as Brenda Lee. She is my jogging partner, my friend, and the one who knows me best, who knows me as I am – raw and unguarded. And it was on this day that she also became my vessel of flight.

***word of warning***

I do not recommend this to anyone (especially professionals!) I only ask that you ask,“What would you do in order to feel Love’s presence carry you Galloping to Freedom?”

On this day, Brenda Lee and I meandered down to the edge of a stream by a field, as we had done almost every day for the last two years. We walked and jogged three to five miles together (Brenda Lee on a lead, myself on foot) on a path that led us into the woods and to a beautiful brook on the edge of a glen.

We came across four friends on horseback who (jokingly) invited us to join them. I accepted the offer, realizing that they had no idea how long and fast Brenda Lee and I could run together. I knew we would have no trouble keeping pace along the wooded trails, even though I was on foot and they were mounted.

Off we went together, the ten of us; five humans and five equines. We all kept pace together with Brenda Lee and I bringing up the rear. You see, Brenda Lee is quite the protective “Alpha” mare personality and does best in groups with a generous space bubble.

As the trail ended, it led us to a thirty acre field surrounded by (typical) old stone walls. The other four riders exchanged glances and turned to me to say they were parting ways, as they planned to race across the open field.

Brenda Lee and I watched as in one moment all four horses rocked back onto their hocks like a coiled spring and in one thunderous whoosh the riders softened the reins, allowing the horses to spring forward in unison. The ground shook with a vibration that carried itself straight into my chest. Time seemed to stand still as Brenda Lee and I stood anchored in the ground, following the group as they shrank into the distant horizon, finally disappearing behind the 200 year old stone wall.

I drew a breath. Only then was the moment of suspense broken and Brenda Lee started snorting, hopping and jumping around on the end of her lead like a “Shire Rabbit”.

God, I always wanted to be able to do what they had just done.
In the midst of the equine thunder something had let go inside of me – perhaps it was reason? Reason be-damned, my emotional horsepower was released.

What I did next would change my life forever – in every way.
I climbed atop an old log and with Brenda Lee looking more and more like a fire breathing dragon, I jumped on board.

Gallop to Freedom

As I landed on her back she rocked back onto her hind end and exploded into the gallop that would set me free. We shot forward together and I became aware that I had just surrendered all of myself to her.

Brenda Lee accelerated with each stride, twisting, turning and throwing her head trying to get me to release my grip and just “Be” with her. I realized that all of my fear, doubt and feelings of “less than” were contained in that vice grip. In clutching, I was bringing them along with me as well as all of my excitement, passion, desires and feelings of “Yes than”.

I immediately picked up the lead rope to realize that all 12 feet were hanging off to one side and, of course, I had not put on the bareback pad with that little leather handle to hold onto. As I settled into this reality, Brenda Lee had straightened out as was coming up to full speed. It was too late to bail so I assumed the “Pony Express” position of the American cowboy galloping across the West.

I assumed this posture quite well, even muttering,”duh-dump, duh-dump, duh-dump, duh-dump”. I noticed Brenda Lee’s head up high in rhythm with my “duh-dumps”. For a brief stride I was proud as a peacock, only to have this feeling washed away by the thought,“I do not know what I am doing!!!”

It was at this moment that the words of my friend and Natural Dressage teacher came into my mind and spilled (thank God!) down into my body:
“Surrender. Open your hips and surrender. Let go and surrender what is inside of you to the power of the horse below you, and she will carry you to lands unknown.”

Gallop to Freedom

Because I had no better alternative, and because I’d had the realization that this was going to end with broken bones – mine or even worse – Brenda Lee’s – I let go.

I opened my hips, released my grasp and surrendered all of myself to Brenda Lee, who now felt solid and steady and rhythmic underneath me, witnessing my awareness.

What happened next was the most spiritual experience of my life.
I opened my hips – breathed and surrendered – and together, we disappeared.

Brenda Lee’s head dropped out of sight, lowering to the ground as she accelerated into an even faster speed. (This was related to me by the other riders, as they had now turned to watch us from the top of the field.)

I experienced “No Brian” and “No Brenda Lee”.
There was only just “pure awareness” floating across the field in complete loving silence.

What I felt can be described as,“Everything and Nothing” coexisting at the same time.

It was only for a few seconds – but it felt like forever.

As we reached the top, Brenda Lee transitioned to a high energy trot, a walk and, finally a stop where I fell to the ground, crying like a baby.

Over the next few months I would go to this place daily to hop on Brenda Lee and “Gallop to Freedom”. Brenda Lee would carry me to heaven, a journey we took together, where I finally felt “Enough”.

Brenda Lee showed me the place where all of my fears and doubts coexisted with my passions and desires. She showed me that this was possible, and it was all okay.

I was free!
Free to “Be”, and that began my conscious awareness of my responsibility to free myself, to become what my heart is calling me toward.

That was the beginning of my coming Home.

How about you?

Will you let your “Truth” set you free?
Will you give yourself permission to engage your “Personal Horsepower”?
Breathe – open your hips – surrender yourself and gallop toward freedom!

Gallop to that space where all is accepted “As Is”.
Move with all of yourself, toward your “As If: Imagined Feelings”.

Listen closely. Give yourself permission to feel “Enough”.
Can you hear the whisper?
“You Are Enough!”

You have enough Horsepower within you – Hop on and get ready to Gallop and Soar!
Gallop to Freedom.

Feel the Connection,
Brian Reid